


Problem Customer

by VerbenaHA



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, coffee shop AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-10
Updated: 2015-10-10
Packaged: 2018-04-25 19:12:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4972966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VerbenaHA/pseuds/VerbenaHA
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Did you need something?” Levi asked instinctively, but he could hear the worry in his voice.<br/>“I wanted to talk to you some more,” Erwin said, but he noticed the expression on Levi’s face. “What’s wrong?”<br/>“There’s a dog in the freezer…”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Problem Customer

The new school year had taken several good employees away from work and back to class. Between training new cashiers and trying to keep the tables clean after customers had put their greasy food all over them, Levi felt a little stretched thin. He consolidated and decided that Hanji had it worse: answering phones in the sorry excuse for an office in the corner of the kitchen. That, and dealing with paperwork. He had his share of paperwork too, but he was only the Shift Leader and not a manager. 

Both he and Hanji had worked their way up the ranks at the same time but Levi decided he liked working face to face with customers more than managing the restaurant. He was typically introverted but there was something about the communication between employee and customer that fascinated him. He felt empowered but also strangely disconnected from himself. He could be whatever he wanted to be. It was an act.

There was an art to asking a customer how their day was and whether or not they wanted their food for dine in or carry out. He only needed to ask the same questions and he usually got the same answers, unless a customer felt talkative. He had to listen but only had to respond with five words: “Would you like a receipt?”

The newspaper review that hung on the wall praised both Levi and Hanji for always having smiles on their faces, ready to serve. Most customers were friendly and plenty of them had a good sense of humor. One of the regulars considered him and Hanji her “babies”.

Eren bit his lip while he studied the menu. He had worked there for two days. Levi didn’t expect him to have the hundred odd selections memorized, but trying to find the right button on the register was a challenge. There were several pages of options on the registers and everything was abbreviated—some of the sandwiches were listed with only a few letters to signify them. A BLT notwithstanding, a Southwestern Turkey Melt with Cheddar might be labeled ‘TM’.

This was a laid back community. Most customers had already forgiven Eren for his slow service and redundant mistakes. “You’re new,” one of the customers said simply, giving him a wink. Levi could remember those days of being new. Eren took time off over the weekend and Levi did not push him to study the menu while he was off work. 

 

During the slow hours between the lunch and dinner rush, Levi leaned his elbows on the counter, resting his chin in his hands. The dining room was clear, the floor swept, the bathrooms checked, the bussing station clean, and all the different flavors of nacho chip samples displayed on the counter were organized. To stay busy, he could have taken out the trash a little early or cleaned the tea bins, but it was Sunday. One o’clock on Sunday. The tall, blonde window washer was there.

Six floor-to-ceiling windows lined the front of the dining room. Soap glided over the glass, one window at a time, covering up the greasy smudges and dirt. In steady, unhurried strokes, a squeegee came down across the windows, wiping away the bubbles and leaving behind a gleaming surface like a disappearing magic act. It was hypnotic.

Petra walked out of the kitchen with a fresh stack of disposable cups in her hands. She glanced at him while she restocked and asked, “It’s fun to watch, isn’t it?” Levi nodded silently. He checked the time and decided it was time to make fresh coffee. He turned around but while he worked he heard the front door open. He spun back around.

“Hello there!” he called.

“Hey,” said the tall blonde window washer. “Can I borrow some hot water?”

It was not a customer, it was someone asking for water. That situation always made Levi blank for a moment. Should he charge for the water? Should he put it in a cup? He stared, slightly open mouthed at the man before saying, “Yes, go ahead.” There was no reason to charge for water and the man had a bucket with him. He could carry the water in that.

“Thanks,” said the man and he went into the kitchen. 

After all the windows were washed, the man came back in. 

“Coffee smells good,” he said.

“Want a cup?” Levi asked.

“Not today, but what about tomorrow morning? Are you working?”

“I am.” Levi smiled. “I’ll have a clean cup ready for you.”

“Perfect. I’m Erwin.”

“Levi.”

 

The morning air was still warm for September. The cool breeze did not appear till late afternoon. The trees were still green and fresh. Levi drove to Hanji’s apartment in his work shirt and shorts. He honked his horn and waited for her to come bounding out of the house. This morning she was in her uniform with black slacks instead of khaki. Trailing behind her was a massive Alaskan malamute.

“That the dog your cousin sent you to watch?” he asked.

“Yes,” Hanji said. Something was wrong.

“Why did you bring it outside?”

“My AC is broken.”

“…So?” Levi asked.

“So you know my building is without water all this week, right?”

“Yes…”

“He can’t stay at home. It’s too hot inside,” Hanji said. She stood by the car door with the leash in her hands. The dog was lying down comfortably in the dry grass that was dying quickly without the sprinklers running. Damn busted pipes.

“So tie him up outside,” Levi suggested, but as he said it he knew that was a bad idea. Hanji lived in this part of town to be close to her grandparents who refused to leave their childhood home despite the rising crime and rapidly dropping city concern for things like road repair and water pip maintenance. The car smash-and-grabs were one thing, but the number of home invasions had skyrocketed lately.

If Hanji left a huge, pedigree dog tied up outside, it would be in the back of someone’s car before noon. At most, it was sixty seven degrees at the moment with the sun still hiding behind the horizon, but it was supposed to get up to eighty before the afternoon. In Hanji’s tiny matchbox of a home it would get above ninety degrees without leaving the windows open. And she couldn’t even leave a tub of cold water for him to splash in…

“He’s going to stay in the freezer.”

“…Not at work,” Levi said.

“Yes, at work.”

 

“Someone’s having a bad day…” Hanji said, watching a woman leave the register to find a seat in the dining room.

“Yeah, me,” Eren murmured.

“That was not your fault,” Levi said honestly.

After a long and heated argument with Hanji over how many health codes would be broken by keeping a pet in the freezer, he caved when she pulled the manager card and promised to take him to a kennel that afternoon. Hell, he would even pay for it to keep the freezer free of dander and whatever else a dog size might be carrying in its fur. All the food had been triple wrapped in preparation and several boxes stacked precariously out of the way. The dog was tied down in the corner. It seemed to smile as it felt the cool fan running over its nose and closed its eyes in bliss.

The whole time Levi had been organizing a place for the dog to nap, he had left Eren abandoned in the dining room on a Monday morning. Without Petra there to help him, it was taking three times longer to finish ringing in customer orders. Levi had walked out of the kitchen to see the squat woman arguing with Hanji. Eren had tried her patience while he searched in vain for the Grilled Chicken Salad button.

Ten minutes later, Levi brought the plate of chicken salad to the angry woman’s table.

“I’m sorry about the confusion earlier,” he said when he put down the food. He did not know what to expect from the woman. She was a little familiar, but she seemed to have the air of a problem customer: bitter, resentful, and impatient.

“Yes, well,” the woman said, still staring at a spot on the wall: “One kid didn’t know how the register worked and that girl was being a bitch.”

“Sorry?” Levi asked.

“I said she was being a bitch. She was the one that was bothering me.”

If by bothering she meant that Hangi had been trying to deal with one of the worst customers of the century under pressure, then yes, Hanji had been quite a bother. 

“Yes, well,” Levi said calmly, “she’s stressed.” He couldn’t mention the dog in the freezer so he made something up. 

“The fruit truck was late today.”

The woman picked up her fork, not looking at him. “Well, that doesn’t bother me none, I didn’t order fruit.”

Levi felt cold. He wanted to break something. It was also possible that he had a twitch in his eye. He walked away to find a fresh rag so that he could clean something and distract himself when he heard the woman gag. He spun around, “What happened?”

“This chicken is bad!”

Levi’s brow furrowed, confused. “Do you mean it’s too cold, or—”

“No, this is rotten chicken! You’re chicken’s gone bad!”

No… Levi thought. After everything else this woman did not even like the food. She did not simply dislike it, she was calling it inedible. He still wanted to salvage this somehow, not because he wanted her to come back but because rumors of bad chicken, on top of everything else, would ruin Hanji’s week.

“Do you want something different?” he asked. 

“No, I can’t eat anything here.” She folded her hands in her lap and would not look at him.

Levi picked up the plate and ignored her empty cup. To hell with getting this woman a refill, she was too much trouble.

“Hey.”

Levi turned to the voice behind him. “Hello there—oh, hi!”

It was Erwin. “I came for that coffee.”

“Right… uh, let me get this food out of the way.”

“Take your time.”

Levi brought the plate to the kitchen knowing full well the chicken was fine. Two months ago, one of the refrigerators had stopped working, but all that went bad was some butter and sour cream. The odds that the refrigerator holding the chicken had stopped working since he last checked it were astronomical. It was best to throw away the salad and forget about it, but that would have broken a few rules... Whether he liked it or not, he had to tell one of the cooks what happened.

“Mike,” he said, his tone flat. “Customer says this chicken’s bad.”

Mike turned around, looking confused as Levi had been. “Bad?” He picked up a piece off the plate Levi held and smelled it before he stuck it in his mouth and chewed it. “It’s fine.”

“Let me give you some advice,” Levi said with a definite twitch in his eye, “Don’t eat anything someone has finger fucked. You can get sick real fast doing that.” Mike shrugged. 

“The chicken’s fine.”

“I know that, this customer is just being a pain.” Levi threw out the salad. In the dining room, Erwin was already sitting down. Levi tucked a cup of decaf under his nose and hurried back to find a rag. Thirty minutes later, the woman was gone—several nacho chip samples left on and under her table.

Levi threw his rag down to go grab a broom. Petra caught up to him by the storage closet.

“Levi…” she said. Her voice was low, her eyes wide.

“What?”

“We need to get all those chip samples away from the registers.”

“Why?” In reality, there was not supposed to be food lined up in bowls on the front counter, but so many customers had asked for them that Hanji made the executive decision to leave a bunch up there and save Levi the trouble of running back and forth to get them.

“The health inspector is here.” Petra took the broom out of his hands and ran to give the dining room a top to bottom thorough cleaning. Levi could imagine exactly what kind of short, prideful she-devil had called a health inspector to their restaurant. He stood on his tip toes and looked through the window into the kitchen.

Standing just inside the back door was a gentleman in a plaid shirt carrying a small bag of food thermometers. Levi stood still, amazed that one customer having a bad day could cause so much trouble so quickly. They had already left the aftermath of a food fight around their table and now this? Did that woman really believe her chicken had gone bad or was this some petty way to get back at the employees for making her wait five extra minutes while she ordered food?

He felt a presence behind him and turned around to see Erwin standing behind the counter.

“Did you need something?” Levi asked instinctively, but he could hear the worry in his voice.

“I wanted to talk to you some more,” Erwin said, but he noticed the expression on Levi’s face. “What’s wrong?”

“There’s a dog in the freezer…”

Erwin looked much more concerned. “What?”

“A dog!” Levi hissed. “Hangi let her malamute in the freezer ‘cause her AC’s busted and now the health inspector is here! Do you know how many sanitation rules are broken by having a pet near the food?”

Erwin stared at the health inspector, who was having a chat with the Hanji, and licked his lips. “…Okay. Go get the dog and take it outside.” Erwin walked around the counter and went into the kitchen. He marched towards the commotion before Levi could ask him how he was supposed to sneak a full grown malamute out the door.

“Hey!” said Erwin, not unfriendly. He stood in the line of sight of the health inspector and stayed there. “What timing, I wanted to ask you about the new solutions in the window cleaner.”

It was now or never. Levi tried to look calm while he paced without hurry to the freezer. Opening up the door he saw Hanji’s massive white and grey Alaskan malamute actually panting a little while it lounged next to an old box of lemons. He prayed the poor thing knew that it needed to be as quiet as possible and keep its mouth shut.

“Alright buddy, hush. Hush now, okay?” Levi said, trying his hand at puppy-talk. The husky stared at him but leaped to his feet when he unhooked its leash from the wall. Levi cracked open the freezer door and listened.

“-and, obviously, that was way too much chlorine for one mop bucket, I mean you could smell it all the way out into the street!” That was the health inspector talking. There was a little laughter from the other employees while he talked. These kinds of business people did not get distracted easily but somehow, someway, Erwin had managed it. 

The health inspector was preoccupied with his story but the little huddle of people making fun of some poor girl who hadn’t known how a dust pan worked was still too close to smuggle a dog behind. Hanji was two steps away from the freezer door…

“I wanted to ask you about the windows, actually,” Erwin ventured. It was an excuse smoothly delivered, but obviously a distraction. There was very little reason for health inspectors to study anything outside the kitchen, particularly when they were called on account of bad meat.

The smile faded from the man’s face and it was clear he was going to need a very good reason to step outside the kitchen before he went anywhere else.

“There’s this draft at the top of the door and I’m thinking that’s where some mold is coming from, or maybe I’m just paranoid.”

The crowd was gone in ten seconds flat. Levi grabbed the husky by the nape of its neck and bolted for the back door. Outside, the dog roamed around the parking lot until it found a nice patch of grass under a tree. Levi stayed close and sat with it, breathing in the morning air. It was good to be outside in the warm. The truth was, there was a draft over the door but there was no mold. Levi would have found it by now if there was.

Two days later, the certificate of a passed health inspection with a nearly perfect score was up on the wall.

“So what was the damage?” Erwin asked, leaning against the counter while he looked at Levi.

“I was pet sitting, so I wasn’t able to get all the dishes off the tables fast enough. Other than that…”

“Clearly, you needed a health inspection,” Erwin said, rolling his eyes. 

“How was your coffee?”

“It was bad,” Erwin joked. “You’re coffee’s gone bad.”

“Well, I’m just going to have to make a fresh one,” Levi said. “Aren’t I?”

“Forget coffee. How about lunch?”

Levi smiled. “Sure thing. On the house.”

**Author's Note:**

> Take every word of this literally, minus the dog hiding in the freezer, and you have my inspiration for this fic.  
> Some customers you never, ever, ever want to see again.


End file.
